// Looks like Shao forgot about part 1 and is starting on part 2 by making it up as he goes along!
Meanwhile… Dash’s homeland is getting bombed by none other than the PORTS! \\
DUN DUN DUN!!!
Dash> ack! Darn ports! Why don’t they dive somewhere else?
// So Dash quickly unstraps his strap on, gets dressed and goes outside \\
Dash> *dodges bombs* Hmm, where can I go that is safe?
Adz> come here little boys, I’ll protect you! *looks at dash* are you ok little boy?
Come with me and I’ll make sure you are safe, right kids?
Kids> *shakes head from side to side with sad faces all holding their bums*
Dash> hmm, I cant help but think something might happen to me while I am with you but I’ll take my chances!
Adz> ok, now hold my penis children and I’ll take you all to my safe place…ehehhe!
Turbmodious> wow such a small cock, sometimes I wonder how you coof on yourself..
Nagulese> You shouldn’t be wondering about anything, you’re an idiot! NAG! NAG! NAG!
// So Dash, Turbmodious and Nagulese set of with Adz to his…”secret place” \\
Dash> wow nice place, I mean, look at all these jars of Viagra! Wait a minute….
Adz> *tries bumming dash*
Dash> ahh! No body bums me! *zidanes*
Adz> ahhhh! *nose falls off* ohhhhh my nose! *does 80s dance moves*
Dash> wtfux?
Turbmodious> cooool! Lets party! *dances*
// Hey! Where did that disco ball come from? \\
Nagulese> you call that dancing! NAG! NAG! NAG!
Dash> yeah, everyone knows that only I can dance! *rooneys all*
Turbmodious> gah! *trips over dash’s rooney attack* Hating this!
Dash> heh!
// Suddenly, a cloaked person enters….all can feel that he has fallen to the dark side! \\
Darth Shao> KSSSYYYYAAAK!
Dash> translate?
Darth Shao> *zidanes*
Dash> gah! *does jumpflip backwards* so…the final battle starts here eh? Very well I shall end your life! *equips blue lightsaber*
Darth Shao> KSSSSYYYYAAAK! *equips red lightsaber*
// So the fight between Dash the ‘retired’ Barbarian and Darth Shao begins!
Ka-ching, ka-ching – ching – ka ching ! \\
Darth Shao> You were once better than me but now I am the master!
Dash> The dark side leads to chaos and destruction, is this really what you want?
Darth Shao> Ofcourse! The PORTS must die!
Dash> PORTS you say? Then let me join you!
// Dash falls to the dark side! \\
Darth Shao> lets go!
// so Darth Shao and Darth Dash goto the PORTS homeland….rePORT! \\
Kans> AHHH! Anti ports! You shall not pass!
Darth Shao> we shall see about that!
Darth Dash> aye!
// big fight \\
Kans> urghhh! Too strong…but…you…..shall….not….PASS!!!
Darth Dash> *zidanes like a mofo!*
Kans> ahhhhhh! *dives*
Darth Shao> good work nub!
Darth Dash> more PORTS await! Lets go!
Adz> Master Snak, the anti ports have broken into our base, what is your command?
Snak> let them cum, I will won them all! *turns around* what is that on your ear?
Adz> *wipes cum* nothing…
\\ SMASH! THE DOOR BREAKS OPEN! //
Darth Dash> it is time to put an end to the PORTS!
Snak> maybe, but what is this story called?
Darth Dash> err..*looks at Shao*
Darth Shao> umm…PORTWARS: KNIGHTS OF THE OLD PORT?
Darth Dash> good enough!
Adz> how did you get in here! Nevermind that! You shall pay! *uses force pull to take lightsaber*
Darth Dash> bastard..
\\ So Dash and Adz fight in hand to hand combat! //
Darth Dash> hiiiiiya!
Adz> OW! *dance dodges and grabs Dash’s nuts*
Darth Dash> mother…! *grabs Adz’s nuts*
Adz> ehhehehhe *enjoys*
Darth Dash> gah! *zidanes*
Darth Shao> *rooney combos*
Adz> I….have failed…..*cum drips out of mouth*
Snak> truth is a lie, there is only ports, through ports I noob bash, through noob bashing I gain shaman rank, through shaman rank I act like a complete fuckhead!
This is the way of the PORT! *dives at dash*
Darth Dash> ahhhhhhh! He bit my bollocks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Darth Shao> I’ll pull him off *pulls*
Darth Dash> aAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! My FUCKING BOLLOCKS!!!!!
Darth Shao> you should of shaved your pubes aswell as your bum then ya nub!
Darth Dash> AHHHHHHH! But my bum is shiney
…..AHHHHHH!
Snak> *dives off*
Darth Shao> dam, he escaped…
Darth Dash> mother fucker biting me!
Darth Shao> *Draws lightsaber against Dash*
Darth Dash> wtf you doing?
Darth Shao> you’ve been bitten, you’ll become…one of them…
Darth Dash> it cant be…there must be a cure…
Turbmodious> how come I don’t talk much in this one? *trips over bug* ahhhhh!
Nagulese> cos you sucx! NAG! NAG! NAG!
Darth Shao> I’ll let you live for now….put if you start diving I’ll cut you down like Adz’s maw!
// Dash has been infected by that PORT Snak! What will become of him??? Find out in the next part of DASH THE ‘RETIRED’ BARBARIAN!!! \\